Saturday, December 15, 2012

Silly season? What silly season?

So it has begun.

The silly season has made it way into our shops, into our homes, schools and every crevice it so see fit. Of course this also means the pressure on buying gifts, the busy malls, the family tensions, the over eating and the traffic jams have to begun.



Iv been thinking a lot about Christmas, this year. In fact I haven't been in my home country or near family for the last Christmas or two. I know what Christmas is supposed to mean and what it used to represent but the evident truth is we are no longer in Kansas Dorothy. All I wanted the last few Christmas's I have been alone is to be with family on that one particular day. To just spend time with them, that is what I missed most. Not gifts, not being broke, not stressing about impressing or feeling pressured about something I shouldn't, nope, All I missed was my family and their company. Their smiles,their laughs their stories from the year passed and maybe Christmas pudding. I have decided that I personally do not want to do the every year Christmas this year. I do not want presents. I honestly do not, I personally feel that gifts have gotten outrageous and expectant and cause financial problems you don't have to have. I feel if I want to give you a gift I will, any time of the year, the fact that everyone is throwing gifts at you for what has become more of a social tradition does not mean I have to.

I know its harsh to say, I know kids don't understand it. Unfortunately this time of year is where many are either jobless or broke, or going through big changes either from the past year or the coming future and this crazy build up, this social standard this media frenzied month has just gotten out of control. I want to focus on me right now, exactly what I need to do, and I do not want to be lead off track because Iv put stress on myself to do something I no longer believe in? Your friends and family will far more appreciate seeing you be successful in the future, being happy and striving for your goal rather than suffering.

The truth is putting in the extra time at this time of year, makes you look good at work. The truth is working those extra shifts and or overtime brings in that extra new year cash,which you're going to need. The truth is, well to be honest, its better to holiday mid year anyways rather than being stuck in malls, with screaming kids, and trying to buy everyday products at their marked up prices, the truth is, you can get that much more done career wise...now.

I myself am hoping to start work asap. I have also realized that I have finally found somewhere I like being. I recently returned to my home town for a few things, and then when I got their I realized that no.1 I didn't really need all the things Id gone down for, so I ended up not getting 80% of the stuff. no.2 I liked seeing 2 out of the few people I did see, and even then those few were selectively chosen. And the ones that didn't make the short list, well cheerios to them too. I know. I sound terrible. I sound like a bitter old frump. Fact is, Iv managed to step over, or if we really want to sound obnoxious  Iv been through enough and had the guidance of the wisest which has enabled me to step over all the bullshit and possibly skip anymore of the shit, we either put up with or put ourselves through.


Think about it, think about your parents or your friends parents or anyone's parents for that matter. Having made the assumption that you are not a billionaires son or daughter and you didn't go up with constant dinners parties and corporate events being thrown every week at the mansion, answer me this question: How many friends do your parents still have? Real friends? People that know exactly whats going on in their lives, how the kids are, how their parents are? What their loves and loathes are? Someone who can tell when things don't sit right just by picking up the phone? Someone who comes over and brings your mom a bag of chocolates when she;s feeling down?


The answer to that question may be, 1 or 2 or in a very rare case a few. The reason for that is because as we grow as a society and as we grow as humans, the paths our lives take, the choices we make, the things we believe in, the people we love, the values we hold dear, those things all grow with us, and change as we do, and eventually people start drifting and often enough, when you start drifting for those reasons, well it usually doesn't make sense to try and save a friendship with that person. You start believing in yourself more as you get older, I know its a shame, really I could have done with this confidence when I was much younger, I know just that small difference could have changed the path of my life. However here I am now, with it. All of it. The CC Aniqu A Nay Nay ( my ghetto name ) of the world is out, loud and proud and thunder thighing her way down funky town to paint the town Green. This is not a sudden realization, its something I have always dealt with my entire life, fitting in, not fitting in, and all sorts of cliches you can imagine. Iv just come to the point now where I am like, um hey, how you, if you want to be my friend and you want to be in my life then cool,I expect mutual respect, support and plenty laughs, I'll be there for your tears too. However that's all. And I expect interaction. Not a Facebook poke, not an email once every 6 months  I expect you to pick up the phone at least and ask me how I am doing. Those are my terms and conditions. I deserve them and so do you if you value who you are and who you share your life with. I am old enough to make my own decisions and my own choices in life. All I ask is you stand by me. Not inform your beliefs and your opinions on me, if I don't ask for them. And I will do the same. The only time anyone has the right to do that is when their decisions and their actions start affecting you and your life dangerously or unfairly.
Its quite funny, along with my thunder thighing business, Iv discovered I quite like my thighs an so should everyone else. The bikini is not so much for me anymore, but I am working on keeping fit, not many actually know exactly just how close the lines are between fit,fat, and built. I have been granted with huge thighs,they need toning, but I can tell you now, I can kick anyone or anything hard enough to dam well do some major damage, I can carry twice my body weight in my legs alone due to the strength built within them over the years and hard work put into them. My stomach is no longer flat, but it doesn't wobbly and if it did so what, as long as my cholesterol was okay then so be it, lemme wobbly on down to the doughnut shop while I'm at it.








We were not all born in the same gene pool, we were not all born out of the same womb. And even if were were there would be no gaurentee we would all be the same.

 Dear woman: BE YOURSELVES...............PLEASE. I am so sick and tired of people putting themselves down over absolutely nothing, or people judging people. What kind of person are you, when you get joy or feel the right to judge over someone else especially someone you don't know. I often have to stop myself and I make an effort to do so. I'll be walking in the store and turn to look at someone, sometimes an innocent thought will pop into my head and I'll say something like: Wow she obviously woke up with no mirrors in her closest. How DARE I judge her. Who am I? It annoys me when people say things to me like that so how dare I do it to some one else, what an hypocritical action.

Please if you want to wear one green shoe and one purple go ahead, life's to short and if it brings a smile to your face or makes you happy every time you look down, then so be it. I wear lumo every chance I get, I wear ties and long sleeves on hot sunny days, and I def should not wear the shorts I do, but It makes me happy and it makes me smile and there is nothing else in this world that could replace my joy or yours. There is way to much sadness, war, poverty and death for pettiness like so.

Well those are the things on my mind, for this afternoon at least. I hope to write again tomorrow to tell you about all the funny and wonderful things that have happened this week, as there are plenty.

Mwah Big hugs and kisses, Peace!

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